In my last blogpost, we looked at “The Believing Brain”. It capitalises the saying “You’re what you think all day long”.
(If you missed last week’s posting – click here to access it)
This week topic is about “The Rules To Break” by Richard Templar.
From a very young age you’ve been inundated with other people’s rules – parents, teachers, friends – helpful principles, friendly advice and little pointers to help you get on in life. Trouble is, however well -intended, many simply aren’t true (at least not all the time) and yet they’re having a major influence on your life whether you realise it or not.
Richard Templar exposes the most common imposter rules, and offers a refreshing perspective and a new way of thinking.
Rule To Break
Good work speaks for itself – When it comes to work, you just can’t assume that your bosses will notice what you’ve been up to , or realise that it was you who suggested that particularly effective new system, or remember the great piece of work you produced last February. You have to tell them. Look, management people don’t have time to sit around reflecting on what their team members have been up to. They haven’t got time to look at anything if i’s not under their noses. So if you want them to see what you’re up to put it right there under their nose. And then point at it. Rule 13 No one at work will know how good you are unless you tell them
What you do is more important than why you do it – You can fooled most of the people most of the time. In fact you can fool some of the people all of the time. But there’s one person you should never fool, and that’s yourself. It could be that we’re ashamed or embarrassed by our real aim. “Who am I kidding? “Well, that’s partly why I want to do it. But actually the real reason is…”. Your actions could be exemplary. But that doesn’t change the fact that you will lose your way unless, somewhere in your heart, you acknowledge the truth, if only to yourself. Rule 36 Be honest with yourself
You can’t help how you feel – We all talk to ourselves more than we probably realise. It’s not a sign of madness, it’s just how people are. Try monitoring your internal conversations for a few days, and listen out objectively for the tone of voice you use – “you really should have managed this or that” or something along the line. You’ll soon start feeling inadequate and guilty, negative and with low self-esteem. So if you catch your self doing this, stop and reinvent your inner voice. Start telling yourself how well you’re doing (realistically, of course) and cut your self a bit of slack. With persistence, this strategy will work no matter how you got where you are. Rule 49 You feel what you think
Always seek to improve yourself – But when it comes to skills, it’s just silly to try to be good at everything. It’s enormously good for your confidence to work hard at something and feel yourself getting better all the time. It’s another thing when we’re not all cut out to be brilliant footballers or angelic singers. What would be the point in working way at something I could never excel in, when I could be putting that effort and time into something I did have a chance at? Rule 52 Accept your shortcomings
No one is perfect – This fake Rule is too often just an excuse for making bad choices. Listen, every single day of our lives we are faced with an immense number of choices. And each and every one of these usually boils down to a simple choice between ebing on the side of the angels or the beasts. Every action we take has an effect on our family, people around use, society, the world in general. And that effect can be positive or negative – it’s usually our choice. And sometimes it is a difficult choice. We get torn between what we want and what good for others; personal satisfaction or magnanimity. But if we want to succeed in this life – in terms of how close we get – to generating self-satisfaction, happiness, contentment – then we consciously have to do this. Does it hurt or hinder? Are you part of the problem or the solution? Will things get better or worse if you take certain actions? You have to make this choice for yourself alone. Rule 66 Be on the side of the angels, not the beasts
There are many more rules to break. Templar have written 93 in total in this book. He helps us to master the ability to truly think for ourselves, and follow a path that we’ve chosen, rather than blindly following some one else’s.
It’s your life. Why not live it your way?
To know about his book, click below.
Bye from now.
Reuben H C Ong (a.k.a Reubeno)